Tim is currently working on his bio in the meantime enjoy some placeholder words like this and that and the other one and oh that's a pretty cool word too words words words words words
06.25.2016: Exactly a month since my last update (somehow), I'm once again bringing in some big changes. The forum structure has been revamped AGAIN, essentially reversing the changes made back in November. The 'Old IGNO' style of posting is officially back, by popular demand!! We will henceforth be emphasizing our signature style of spontaneous in-character discussions instead of the ill-attempted shift towards traditional roleplaying. Head over to the Casual RP forum and jump into the action!! And fear not - the traditional topics are still here, they just got a new home, too!! --SG2
05.25.2016: Am I alive again? Who knows. Regardless of my state of existence, I'm doing some much-needed cleanup over at IGNOpedia. I'd like to regain my IGNO mojo and start attracting newbies now that summer break has begun, for the bored folks out there looking for a new RP hangout... --SG2
12.1.2015: Completely rewrote the Element Guide from scratch. Now much more comprehensive!! --SG2
11.24.2015: Major overhaul in-progress!! Changed the skin, revamped the forum structure, and fixed a few things under the hood. Stay tuned for more revisions to the world, the map, and completely redone backstory of IGNOLand!! --SG2
11.12.2015: I'm back from the dead. Time to take a break from playing Skyrim and make a return to IGNOLand - big things planned!! --SG2
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Posted: May 17 2014, 09:57 PM
Some call me inconspicuous // I prefer sly and promiscuousJizzanoid // 17 // Male
Wind // Toastopolis // High Chaos
Weight: 117 Pounds (277 lbs when he gains his muscles)
Figure/Build: Skinny/Thin at a glance, but can grow muscles as he warms up.
Hair: White and spiky in a slicked-back style.
Eyes: Perpetually squinted closed
Skin: Pale with a buttery coloration. Smooth and unusually shiny, due to his constant intake of butter and...various liquids.
When he decides to wear clothes at all, he's usually seen in casual t-shirts, usually of grey tones. He's just as often seen in nothing but a buttery-golden speedo, much to the dismay of everyone.
Pictured: xL with his muscles
Job: He runs the Gas Station Next Door in IGNO City, a gas station and convenience store infamous for its supposed "unsavory" practices. How he has managed to avoid getting shut down for various health code violations remains a mystery, though it is rumored that he has a 'special' means of bribing off the authorities.
Inexplicably, xL is also part of the hottest boyband in IGNO City, The Straight Experience. He is known as 'the goofy one' and is generally the least popular with fangirls.
Though xL is notorious for his promiscuous ways, rumor has it that he originally came to IGNO City as a Toastopian spy working for the revolutionary group known as The 717. His job was to work his way into the inner circle, get access to confidential information on The Empire, and slip out as smoothly as butter. Through various circumstances, he eventually wound up becoming the mask. It is believed that he is capable of being very serious if he wants to, to have been trusted with such a sensitive job in the first place - he just doesn't want to.
Favorite Color: Yellow and white
Personality: Sly, Secretive, Intimidating, Bi-curious. Very curious.
xL hails from small the island nation of Toastopolis to the south of IGNOLand. He belongs to a race of humans called the Jizzanoids, a simple people who have evolved with a dairy dependence thanks to the buttery sea that inexplicably surrounds their island. Though xL's snow-white hair and squinty facial features make him stick out like a sore thumb in IGNO City, back home he is just another face in the crowd full of Jizzanoids that share many of these same characteristics.
Unbeknownst to all his friends, xL was originally involved with a resistance group called the 717 founded in Toastopolis' capitol city of Jizztopia, seeking revolution from the Toastalitarian government of their country. The 717 and their freedom fighter organization, the Jizz Militants, seek to reform the government of Toastopolis into a slicker democracy for the sake of the people. They stand and fight for rulership and economics based off of the physical attributes of butter: delectable to all and capable of improving anything it's spread on.
The scope of xL's duties within the 717 were as mysterious as how he's able to see when his eyes seem to always be closed. However, he was tasked with a mission of grave importance to slide into IGNOLand and gather controversial secrets on Konungur Bones' regime. xL was to make friends in high places in order to gain access to this information, and then make his slippery escape, but something unexpected happened...he came to like these friends that he was supposed to be using to move higher up the ladder and gain access to Bones. As time went by he forgot all about his mission (or if he didn't forget, he at least stopped caring) and decided that he would stay in IGNO City, founding The Gas Station Next Door as a way to spread his warm buttery practices to the dry and crunchy lifestyle of the city.
Now xL is an infamous figure, not for his mysterious background as a freedom fighter but as an advocate of sexual freedoms and practitioner of various forms of sexual deviancy. He has at times attempted to quit this lifestyle and reform his reputation, but always seems to come crawling back on his hands and knees, in more ways than one. Despite his notoriety, xL is as slippery as butter when it comes to getting caught on his various health code violations and somehow always manages to get stay in the good graces of the people.
Skills: Uses the power of butter that races through his veins; can shoot butter through his right hand like Spider Man can shoot webs, only the butter slips through his nails, hence why he is always biting the fingers on his right hand. xL is also very sly and slippery with his movements, which often intimidates anyone who tries to attack him (as does the fact that he likes to fight in a bright yellow thong). No matter how many times you cut him with a chainsaw or send him to space, he quickly reappears unharmed. It's believed to be part of his poetic nature: a poem can often be read and last a millennium. Like a poem, xL will last as long as he is believed to be relevant. Since he is no Shakespeare, it cannot be forever.
Weaknesses: xL is very vulnerable. Though he can reappear after an attack, he is fairly defenseless towards any attacks immediately after reappearing and will often use jokes to intimidate his attacker to make it appear that he is unharmed. However, his biggest weakness may be when his sneaky plans are thwarted. It always lowers his self-esteem, which makes him weaker and even more vulnerable in battle.
Weapon/Combat Power of Choice: While butter slips through the nails of his right hand, his left hand is a prosthetic, though very real-looking. At his elbow, he can slip off his arm and insert his signature weapon: The Toaster; a gun that can shoot freshly hot pieces of toast to his enemies. With his right hand, he can insert butter into The Toaster and make his toast even hotter. he can also use his gun to shoot butter like a water hose, distracting enemies with its deliciousness.
The story goes that xL tragically lost his left hand in a freak masturbating accident. xL had been innocently jerking it in a bakery as he watched the hot baker taking out an even hotter fresh loaf of bread. Then owner noticed this and grabbed his shotgun (every baker has a shotgun in Toastopolis due to the rising increase of 717 revolutionaries and their burning hunger for justice and hot toast), shooting xL who was distracted by his lustful activities. He managed to block the bullet just in time to avoid more serious injury, but lost his entire lower left arm in the process. Being that he became able to attach a toast-shooting weapon in its place and got to wank it to the sexy baker, xL came away from the incident with no regrets.
For reasons unknown, xL is capable of growing huge muscles when he is determined enough. He also supposedly has the power to transform into a gigantic oozing monster dubbed as 'The Jizzard', though this appears to be a rare and involuntary transformation that he has no memory of, only the stories told by those who witnessed the metamorphosis, and the aftermath left by his destruction.